Banana Mango High School - Ebisu Muscats

This is why I loooooove Japan. They can come up with the weirdest combination of things and expect these to be a commercial success. I'm talking about 25 Gravure and AV idols turning into a girl pop group that call themselves the Ebisu Muscats.

They can't sing. They can't dance. (Which is funny because if they're porn stars, aren't they supposed to be able to move well?) But they sure as heck became contagious. Why else would my male colleagues be so hooked that they'd even dance to the Ebisu Muscats' Banana Mango High School single? Disturbing, yes. So instead of watching my male colleagues, which permanently damaged something within me, I just view the real thing.



I can't get over how these girls can't perform, but I'm still surprised at how I keep humming this song in my head. I watch it over and over -- just to get rid of the images of pervy men dancing to it.

By the way, Rio is just so cute. I even looked her up and found out that she's part Japanese, part Portugese. I'm sooo not an AV fan, but I just like staring at her face.

When the single was released, she was 23 years old, even though the song is about naughty high school adventures. Well, the lyrics did cause me to scratch my head in wonder. Japanese boys don't seem to care, though, and even old men are tickled pink by the word play. I don't blame them. With Rio making cute faces at the camera while mouthing the lyrics in such a provocative manner, anyone will forget reason.

This is a cover of one of her DVDs. You can buy these precious Rio adult videos here. Pretty, isn't she?

Once upon a time, Rio used to be fresh-faced and totally looked Japanese. Seems like she's now capitalizing on the other half of her heritage. Go, Rio! In any case, I searched for information about her and found out that she did a lot of...um. Porn. Well, she's an AV star. What else are AV stars supposed to do?

Anyway, if you're interested (and I don't really want to see her spread her legs and ruin the kawaii image in my head), you can take a peek at Rio's visual "portfolio". She even has her own calendar! No wonder her handlers see the need for her to expand her horizons. I just hope they see her potential well enough to give her singing and dancing lessons.

Ebisu Muscats music can also be bought at Amazon.com.

Edit (03.15.2011): So I tried watching one of Rio's adult videos out of curiosity. 5 minutes into the film, the fugliest guy appears and starts kissing her. I kind of threw up in my mouth. A few seconds later, I turned off the player. I don't understand how the prettiest porn actresses in Japan are paired up with dudes that look like they dove into a septic tank before the shoot. Really. I think I'll just stick to reviewing anime hentai.